"I cannot dance, they won't let me sing, and I don't play an instrument, but I do love the performing arts and thus my reason for becoming a volunteer."
- Irving Kelly, 2007
Hey, Kennedy Center. There's a word for people like Irving. Dead weight. I can dance. People beg me to sing. And I play the hoseaphone, kazoo, and Jew's harp like there's no tomorrow. (note: It's actually a regular harp, but I limit myself to Itzhak Perlman tunes and must rest every 7th measure.)
Point being, if Irving gets to be a Friend, I should be too. I even own a bow tie. Mine doesn't look like it came free in a pack of Skittles®, but we can't all be Irving Kelly.
Hopefully, you come to your senses, dump Irving, and bring me on in his place. Or even keep us both, if that's your prerogative.
Special Note: If Irving is on the selection committee, well, then a hearty jk in your direction, pal. Irv, buddy? You still reading?
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